Thursday, January 30, 2014

Working Mama

Thursday Jan. 30, 2014


Before I got into my purpose for writing, did you realize that there are two ways of writing the word mama.  You can write it like I just did, "mama," or as "momma."  I am not sure which way is correct and I have written it both ways but for today's post, I am going to use "mama."  Since life is an adventure, I might just change it up later :).

So a lot has happened the last month.  I had meant to write and update many times but I have just been tooooooooo exhausted.

The other day I was at the grocery store and a woman saw the girls and she said, "Wow!  Twins.  I don't know how you do it.  I could barely take care of one baby.  I don't know how you do it."  That wasn't the first time I have heard that statement or something like it.  I always smile and say, "well, it isn't easy, but we manage."  Yet I think to myself, how would I reallllllly like to respond to that statement.  After talking to my cousin she joked with me, telling me I should say something like, "well....I discovered Robitussin works really well.  I just drug one baby and then I can
Getting ready for the Superbowl game (girls 3.5 months old)
focus on the other one."  OR "well, I use drugs so I never know which way is up. It helps the babies stay quiet too."  OBVIOUSLY, I would NEVER actually say those comments (NOR do I believe in drugging babies and I don't take drugs) but what does that person mean, "I don't know how you do it."  The answer is, YOU DO.  You make it work.  Just like any new mom, I never get any sleep, my babies both cry (usually if I am lucky, at the same time so it isn't a constant thing) and they both need diaper changes and feedings.  I do what every mother of one does, just twice.  

The other comment I just crack up on the inside every time I hear is:  "Oh are they twins?"  What I say out loud:  "Yes."  What I think in my head, "no...one is mine, the other I found on the street corner."

Finally, both my girls have pink all over their car seats.  Pink blankets and pink car seat covers.  Pink pink pink, yet people (mostly men) still come up to me and ask me if they are girls or boys.  REALLY??? The pink wasn't your first clue??  I get that they are just trying to engage in a conversation so my snarky comments are all in my head and in good fun.  Just interesting observations :)

I digress:  So I went back to work last Tuesday. I had almost 4 months at home with my girls.  I
They always find a way to hold each other's hand
wouldn't give up that four months for anything.  It was beyond priceless to be able to be with my girls almost every moment to help develop their life long skills.  That type of bonding time you cannot put a price on.  Even though I have to go back to work, I thank God that at least I got the time I did to be with my girls.  I got to wake up and start the day with them EVERY morning and watch them discover the world until the moment they went down for the night.

Luckily (and believe me, LUCKILY) my girls get to go to "Grandma's" house during the day while I am at work.  My mom is watching them and I am so thankful.  Grandma Daycare was open and....almost ready for business.  Last week Mom got a serious kidney infection.  She thought she was passing a kidney stone so tried to ignore the pain.  After 4 days or so, the pain was so unbearable that she went to the doctor.  They gave her some meds and sent her home.  The next day, the girls and I went over to her house to babysit her and she was throwing up and just miserable so I ended up taking her to the ER.  They ended up admitting her and she was in the hospital for three days.  She was able to get the medication that she needed to get better.  Now OBVIOUSLY my number one concern was my mom getting better but it was also a scary realization that I didn't have any childcare backup.  I had NO idea what I was going to do if my mom wasn't well enough to watch the girls.  I called around trying to find some backups and never really did and thankfully Mom was better and ready to start on my first day back to work...so I thought.

They are just super happy babies :)
Did you know that almost everywhere else in the world countries put Mother's as a priority.  In the Czech Republic it is mandatory that mother's take at least eight months off of work to raise their child.  They are guaranteed their jobs back and during those eight months they still receive a good portion of their pay check.  Mother's in the Czech Republic have the option of taking all the way up to four years (yes I said FOUR years) off and still be guaranteed their job back and they still get a pay check.  The longer they take off, the less of a pay check they get but STILL.  In Washington State mothers that are teachers are able to take off as much sick leave as they have.  The district will pay for FIVE DAYS.  ONLY FIVE DAYS.  The mother is then required to use up her sick leave.  How much sick leave depends on how long you have been in the district and how much you have saved up over the years.  Luckily I had enough sick leave to use up most of my four months.  I still had to take some time off without pay but luckily I had money in savings.  If I hadn't had money saved, I would have had to go back to work after 6 weeks.  The four months I had wasn't clearly enough, there is NO way I would have been ready to go back to work after six weeks.   That is also just what teachers go through.  Other people in other professions may not have any sick leave to use up and have to rely solely on their
Playdate with cousins
savings.  It is just rediculous.  This country puts too much emphasis on work and not enough on raising children that will hopefully grow up to be productive members in society.  How are people suppose to do that while their child is growing up in daycare???  Luckily my mom is my daycare so I know that she will be molding my children's young minds.

Anyway... off my soap box.  First day back to work was EXHAUSTING.  For the last couple months the girls have been going to bed like clockwork at 7:30 and have been sleeping soundly until 5ish in the morning.  Amazing.  The night before I went back to work, Clara must have sensed something was up because she woke up scrrrrrrrrrrrrrreaming every 3 hours or so.  Eventually I had her sleep with me in my bed because I just couldn't keep getting up and going into their room.  I slept from about 11pm until 1 am and then just couldn't get back to sleep.  Finally at 4:30 am I got up and took a shower and got ready for bed.  When I went back in my room, I did have to smile and soak in the visual.  My 14 pound daughter was sleeping in a "t" position in the middle of my bed.  She was sound asleep.  I had slept on the 5 inches of the edge of the bed so she wouldn't fall off and for some reason she got the majority of the bed while I had the silver of the edge.  Clearly that was not going to become a habit...sorry Clara but mama's gotta sleep :)

Everyone was excited to have me back at work and students were excited to see me as well, but I
Adelyn sleeping at Grandma Daycare
was simply exhausted.  I went home and all three of us took a long nap and the girls went to bed at 7:30 ready to repeat the day in the morning.  I am so glad that they slept very well the second night.  I slept a little better but I was still so tired that I forgot their clothes at my house.  Thankfully my mom has extras at her house but man, day two and I am already forgetting things.

Clara 
Unfortunately when I got to my mom's she told me that she was still in pain so Lloyd (Grandpa) was taking a day off so he could watch the girls.  She had to go back to the doctors.  Needless to say, that stressed me out all day.  What if she didn't get better?  What if they readmitted her to the hospital??  Who was going to watch the girls???  When I talked to mom later that afternoon she told me that her doctor put her on a stronger antibiotic and she was actually feeling much better.  THANK GOD!!!

Today was day three and things went much better.  Mom was feeling well and I had a good day
Adelyn smiling for the camera
with the students.  Life is always an adventure.  :)

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